


CARNIVAL OF RUST

by Queenoftheuniverse



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Art, Bike, Blow Jobs, Boys Kissing, Brain Damage, Complete work don't panic, Destiel - Freeform, Hermit, M/M, Name Calling, No idea where Stanford is, Sculpture, Short Chapters, Violence, Violent Crime, deliberately simple, not a wip, not yank picked, true lerv
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-31
Updated: 2016-09-10
Packaged: 2018-08-12 04:34:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 6,069
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7920658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Queenoftheuniverse/pseuds/Queenoftheuniverse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean was a happy lad until Benny cheated and his parents were murdered. Now he hides in an old hangar, creating sculptures.</p><p>Castiel was a bright lad until an explosion in a cafe re-arranged him. Now he speaks in strange sentences and draws pictures upside-down.</p><p>Engineering brings them together but understanding makes them stay.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Hunt a Hare and Turn Her

**Author's Note:**

> I have written this deliberately simple. For reasons.

"CARNIVAL OF RUST"

CHAPTER ONE 

"Hunt a hare and turn her"

Dean Winchester and his brother Sam grew up in Lawrence, Kansas, in a nice suburban house with a dad who was an accountant for the Airforce and their Librarian mom. 

Dean did well in school, although his little brother was way smarter, played football and aced shop because his dream was to build cars. He didn't want to race them or own them. He wanted to build them and look at them, sell them on to people who appreciated fine work and cars that were more art than vehicle. As a consequence of this he also aced art and even had some of his sculptures in a local art gallery, along with other high school artists. 

His parents had practically burst with pride.

Dean clings to this memory sometimes, when days get bad....

He came out in his senior year to a dad who took a week to get his head around it before clapping him on the back and saying he was still a great kid, a mom who loved him anyway, and a little brother who just said "Well DUH, you always had a thing for Han Solo!"

"Bitch!"

"Jerk."

For a brother five years younger he sure was sassy.

When school was done their Uncle Bobby, (the boys' dads step brother) gave Dean a job at his junk yard. 

It was manual labour, pure and simple. 

Use a fork lift and move this smashed car here, crush this one, pull bits off this. He was paid, of course, but the incentive was a sad neglected Chevy Impala he had seen in the back lot one day and fell in love with. Uncle Bobby said he could have it to fix up if he could get it to the spare garage next to Bobby's main house in the front junk yard. Dean simply got the fork lift, roared to the lot, lifted that beauty and took her reverently to her what was to be her new home for the next three years.

Uncle Bobby smiled and Dean realised it had been a simple test to see just how enthusiastic his nephew had been about the car. Uncle Bobby told him then the car had been his dads when he was younger and that Dean had come home from hospital in it as a baby. They had it for a time when Sammy was tiny but practicalities got in the way and John had retired the car to the back lot until it called to Dean.

The Great Car Unveiling came the same day Sammy got into Engineering at Stanford. Dean and he celebrated by driving into Lawrence and cruising around in the shiny black car Dean had lovingly named "Baby." 

It was true lerv!

Then Dean fell in love with a human.

His name was Benny and he was a handsome ex-fisherman turned antique shop owner with a creole accent and a sexy pea coat. They started dating and Dean was over the moon. Benny was funny, acerbic, pretty to look at and dynamite in bed. Most of the calls Dean made to Sammy consisted of Benny's new amazing thing-he-had-done, and Sammy was stupidly happy for his brother. 

Sammy told Dean how hard but rewarding his courses were, of the friends he was making, a cute girl called Jess he was going to ask out on a date, and a funny boy called Gabe who had started Uni late and liked sweets and pranks and had a gigantic family.

It was at Benny's shop that Dean first tried his hand at fixing a pushbike. It was much simpler than a car but Dean got the same thrill in the finished product. What's more, he began to think..what if push bikes could be moveable art....?

Everything was coming up Dean until one terrible day when Dean was too early to two shocking events, one after the other, melding together to change Dean Winchester in ways that still even now affected him.

The day that changed his whole life.

The day he came to know as the end of the world as he knew it.

#


	2. I was lying on the grass

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benny sucks.

CHAPTER TWO

"I was lying on the grass"

"Benny!?" Dean called out as he pushed the back door to the antiques shop open. "Bobby let me out early but I figured I'd stay in my coveralls and work on the bike. I got it out in Baby's trunk..."

He stopped. 

He could hear some strange sounds coming from the back room where Benny and he dossed sometimes if they were late working or simply hanging out in the shop. 

"Ben..."

Dean pushed open the door to the room.

There was no mistaking what he was seeing. 

Benny was naked. 

The girl underneath him was naked. 

They were fucking, right there, on the cot Dean and Benny had rolled around in more times than Dean cared to count.

"Babe...BABE!" The girl under Benny said, staring in horror at Dean and thumping Benny on the shoulder. He'd been too busy kissing her neck to hear Dean enter. 

When Benny looked up his face was blank. His eyes met Deans and for a second there was anger in the Creoles eyes. 

Then he grinned.

"Deano!" He cried, voice husky with what Dean could only assume was a throat sore from orgasmic cries. "Join us?"

"Benny!" Dean could only whisper, horrified, eyes gone saucer sized with shock. His vision started greying as his brain caught up. 

Benny...

love of his fucking life...

was cheating on him...

with a woman! 

how long...

how could Benny feel so differently about him...

had Dean not told him he loved him enough? 

or too much? 

....what had gone wrong!!??

He spun and ran, tears blurring his sight. As he crashed down the hallway he heard Benny yell:

"Deano! It doesn't count....SHE'S A WOMAN!" 

Dean leaped into Baby and tore out of the back parking lot, gravel flying. 

The bike he was going to fix up thumped in the trunk and Dean thought, almost hysterically, shit, that will fuck it up more, but he just wanted out of there, out of there fast.

He does not remember getting home, parking, going inside the house but he must have done because the horror that now left him scarred for life took place inside his childhood home. 

He knows he crashed the middle of it, there in his lounge room, his mothers terrified eyes, his father already...

There was blood on the rug....

There was screaming and shouting and threats and pain too....

The only thing he can remember very clearly from that terrible afternoon was later, rocking on the side of the hospital bed, in his bloodied coveralls, side of his face a mashed pulp, thanking every angel in existence that Sammy had not been there. 

He was safe, in University, away from the shit storm that now became Deans every waking moment.

#


	3. Lock my past in the basement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel :D

CHAPTER THREE

"Lock my past in the basement"

Castiel Novak was the youngest child of a family of eight children.

Michael was the oldest, then came three more sons in quick succession, Luke, Urial and Inias. After that were twin daughters Anna and Naomi. Then the youngest two, Gabriel and Castiel. 

They had strict but happy parents. 

James, their dad, was a teacher of Biblical Archeology and their mother Rachael worked at a huge biblical museum which held what many thought to be one of the gigantic stone anchors of the actual Ark.

Castiel was a bright, happy child. 

His whole family indulged him when younger, especially when they discovered he was as smart as them, smarter in the case of Gabriel, the brother only fourteen months older than him and with whom Castiel was closest. 

It was no surprise that Castiel breezed through school, a popular smart boy with stunning looks that people admired. Lots of girls loved his deep sea-ice blue eyes, dark messy hair and pretty lips but Castiel was quite shocked to discover at fifteen that he was entirely gay. 

Not as shocked as his parents who tried to pray away the gay. 

They even sent him to gay camp. 

Nothing worked.

Castiel remained staunchly a boys boy. 

In the end the family refused to acknowledge it and a little bit of shine left Castiel's eyes. 

The only ones who didn't care were his oldest sister Anna who admitted to Castiel she was Bi, and Gabriel, who would love Castiel no matter who his brother chose to kiss. 

And kiss Castiel did. 

He was aware that his good looks got men panting after him and he loved to encourage them. With his lips, he was quite promiscuous, but his body remained un-breached. 

Kissing was fun, and not all that gay. 

If he went all the way his parents would KNOW FOR SURE he was homosexual, and he wasn't even ready for that himself.

Gabriel held Castiel many a night when his dark-haired baby brother cried over this or that boy, this or that married man who refused to leave his wife, this or that man who tried to get him to go 'All the way'. 

Castiel was never ready for that.

Despite these hiccups Castiel was clever enough to go to Stanford and read pre-law. 

His brother Gabriel, despite being older, started there a few years later. 

He had been side tracked by alcohol, gambling, and strip shows. 

He worked as a barman at seedy clubs for years until Castiel scraped him up one too many times off the filthy carpet of yet another back room poker game, covered in his own blood, missing three teeth and two thousand dollars. 

Castiel didn't want to but he gave Gabriel an ultimatum. 

Get clean or Castiel would have to walk away. 

"I can't see you like this Gabriel. It hurts me more than I can even say." He whispered into Gabe's filthy hair, there on the carpet. 

Gabriel booked himself into rehab that day, did his stint drama free, came out clean and fresh as a daisy, retaining his brothers love but with a candy addiction to replace his gambling and alcohol addictions. 

Castiel didn't mind, it was kind of endearing.

By the time Castiel joined a firm of lawyers in the City his brother was accepted into Stanford reading Engineering. 

He fit in perfectly, made two instant friends, Sam and Jess, despite being older than them. 

Castiel was so proud of his brother. 

They shared a flat down town and, even though Castiel was super busy, they managed most days to have dinner together or at least meet at their favourite bakery for lunch.

Gabriel was ever thankful to Castiel for saving his life. 

Castiel said it was a brothers job but that he was happy to because he loved Gabriel. 

Gabriel said he loved Castiel too and one day, he promised, he would repay the kindness his baby brother showed him.

That promise was fulfilled the very next week and looked like never ever ending, all because someone hooked a gas bottle up incorrectly near a naked flame.

Gabriel wept and prayed over Castiel's hospital bedside for ten days, begging his comatose brother to wake up, open his eyes, come back to him.

However, when Gabriel's prayers were answered, those open eyes revealed a very different Castiel than had closed his eyes ten days before.

#


	4. I am waiting at the counter for the man to pour the coffee

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eek! Explosion!

CHAPTER FOUR

"I am waiting at the counter for the man to pour the coffee"

~Ten days earlier~

"Gabriel!" Castiel smiled as he arrived and shook his brothers hand before bringing him in for a hug. 

Gabriel had claimed a table at the local bakery they frequented and had already read the menu to see what he wanted.

"Castiel, I'm so pleased you could make it!" Gabriel said, as he sat again. 

Castiel removed his trench coat and hung it on the back of the chair. The brothers loved coming here when they could, this bakery had the best coffee and croissants in the city. 

"I'm happy to be here too Gabriel." He smiled, and sat across form his brother in his waistcoat, rolled shirtsleeves and tie tucked but askew. 

Gabriel smiled. His brother was such a hot mess!

"Are we here to celebrate anything?" Castiel asked, mock suspiciously.

"More to ask you something." Gabriel admitted. "My friend Sam has an older brother, Dean. Only family left see, their parents were murdered a ways back. Dean's a recluse, lives in the giant hangar outside the city and builds Art Bikes."

"Murdered?" Castiel frowned.

"Do you remember that home invasion where the couple were killed and their son injured? Dean is the son. Sammy was at University when it happened. Jess and I looked after him. He seems fairly okay now."

Cas nodded. 

"What are Art Bikes?" He asked then.

"Like...push bikes that are part bike, part sculpture. Dean makes these one-of-a-kind pieces and sells them to galleries."

Castiel cocked his head.

"Okay, that's a new one."

"Well, for our course we have to build a bridge you see." Gabriel went on. 

"Engineers are good at that." Castiel noted.

"We are!" Gabriel winked. "Or we will be. Anyway, Sam wants to take me over to Deans hangar and see about him helping us build a bridge, but as a massive bike, to get extra credit for thinking outside the box. We were given this assignment today, but we don't even have to start it for six months. We just wanted to set things in motion, you know? There's a lot of really smart people in this course!"

"Why are you telling me this? You want something!" Castiel said, smiling. 

"Thing is, Dean is a Howard Hughes type recluse, only lives for his Art Bikes. We need an 'in' with him or he won't even see us." Gabriel noted the waitress coming their way and rushed out: " He loves old cars and your pimp mobile may just lube our way in with Dean easier!"

Castile looked affronted.

"It's not a pimp mobile! It's a classic car!" He cried.

"It has red valour roof lining dude.."

The waitress interrupted the 'debate' and took their orders. 

Coffee, croissants.

The music changed then. 

Gabriel would always remember these last few seconds with his brother. 

'Heat of the moment'

Kansas. 

And then the world went black, and ringing, and Gabriel was on his back, strange ringing in his ears, the smell of dust and fire up his nose, his baby brother over him, protecting him to the last.

And that sticky stuff all over them was a torrent of Castiel's blood.

 

#


	5. Sitting on a park bench years away from fighting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Deans day

CHAPTER FIVE

"Sitting on a park bench years away from fighting"

Deans day hardly varied now.

Get up. 

Put sweat soaked sheets in washing machine. 

Remake bed with fresh sheets.

Shower. 

Shave, taking particular care around the scars on his temple and cheek. 

Dress in t-shirt and coveralls, boots, and socks. 

Put sheets in the dryer.

Coffee. 

Toast. 

Out to the hangar. 

Raise the roller door to let in the air and light. 

Sculpt until he can't see. 

Dinner. 

Bed. 

Try to sleep.

Some days were better than others. 

Some days he sang along to the radio, talked to his bikes, polished Baby as she sat in the hangar, un-driven but still loved, ate proper meals.

Some days he only drank coffee.

Some days he had panic attacks that had him sweating bullets, screaming and forgetting where he was for minutes, sometimes up to half an hour. 

No sculpting was done on those days.

His hand hurt too much from punching imaginary foe which were mostly walls.

He was still triggered by the strangest things.

Rugs.

Blood.

Loud noises like slamming doors and honking car horns.

Guns, of course.

Shouting....that was the worst. Shouting and swearing and threats....

It was why he rented the hangar with it's shiny concrete floors, and refused to be near people. 

They were unpredictable and raised their voices. 

Dean couldn't tell if the sounds were happy or angry anymore so he just removed himself from civilisation. 

He sculpted. 

It was his therapy. 

Sam sold the house after...after...that day. 

Dean sank half the money into sculpting supplies, bikes, pipes, parts, a welding machine and a years rent for a hanger with a small house and office attached. 

He also bought a computer to design bike specs and Skype Sam.

Sam took his half and stayed in school. 

He was in his last year and he was doing really well, of course. 

Dean was proud of his smart brother.

However much he loved his brother, though, he refused to return to civilisation. 

He had no idea if he ever would. 

It was still too raw. 

Everything hurt. 

Sammy was the exception naturally, although that was only every two weeks with supplies both food and art. 

So far Dean was okay. 

He was okay....

Tonight was Sam's Skype night so Dean made sure he was finished, fed and showered. 

His brother could always tell if Dean was not doing the little things to look after himself and he was a terrier with puppy dog eyes of disappointment if Dean so much as had an eyebrow out of place.

The puppy dog look was too much!

Dean sat at his desk, a coffee at his side, and switched on his computer. 

Within five minutes the Skype music played and Dean answered the call. 

His goofy little brother with his girly princess locks appeared.

"Hey Sammy." Dean smiled. 

His face creaked. 

It had been a while since he had needed to move it.

"Hey Dean, how are you?"

"Awesome. How about you, still being a genius?"

"As always." 

"Have you asked Jess out yet?"

Sam went a bit pink.

"Not yet, okay? It's just...I like her, and she's my friend. I don't want to complicate things."

"I understand that." Dean nodded. 

There had been nobody since Benny of course, and Benny was a cheating bastard anyway. 

He'd been to see Dean in hospital after...everything...but Dean had tried to strangle him, screaming that it had been all the big creoles fault and his parents were dead because of him. 

It had not been fair but Dean didn't feel guilty, even if Benny still felt awful....if he felt anything at all of course.

"So Dean....I need to ask you something...." Sam said, pulling Dean back to now.

"Shoot." Dean said.

"Gabe, and I were assigned a project at the beginning of this year, and now we need to start it. We need to build a bridge. We put our heads together and we thought we would like to do something radical, something way out of the box. With your help we would like to build a big old bridge bike."

Sam sounded so excited. 

Dean hated to say no.

"Sam...people..." 

"I can vouch for Gabe Dean. He's funny, smart, and I can warn him to be quiet. He's been through a lot these last six months. His brother and he were caught up in that bakery explosion, the one that killed the waitress and maimed heaps of others. Gabriel's brother was one who got hurt. He shielded Gabriel and now he has brain damage and Gabriel is his main carer. He goes everywhere with him now, even to school, because he freaks if he's away from Gabriel."

"That sounds-"

"You should see Castiels car Dean."

"Castiel?"

"Gabriel's brother."

"The one with brain damage? He can drive?"

"No, he sits in the back seat. He loves the car Dean, but let's Gabriel drive it now. It's so beautiful, you'd love it. Creamy seventies Pimp Mobile with red valour roof lining..." Sam whistled.

"Yeah....?" Dean asked, raising his eyebrows.

Same grinned.

"Gotcha!" He said. "You are so easy!"

"Fine. Fine, ONE visit. I'll go over the specs with you and Gabriel, if his brother lets me go over the car."

"I'll let them know the rules. I'm sure it will be fine. Gabriel will be bankrolling the whole thing, his family are old money."

Dean nodded. 

Sam knew not to yell or move quickly around Dean but other people were not so careful. 

Maybe Gabriel would be okay, having to care for his brother who was as screwed up as Dean, but maybe not too. 

Hell, how much trouble could one visit be?

They made arrangements for the next week and ended the call.

Dean had a good night but still had to wash his sheets in the morning.

#


	6. Every night the men would come around and lay their money down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel's brain.

CHAPTER SIX

"Every night the men would come around and lay their money down"

Castiels brain had been damaged in the explosion. 

Something had impacted the part of his head that affected fine motor skills and also made him reticent to talk in anything other than snippets that were hard to follow, when he talked at all.

He had a thousand yard stare most of the time, and when he eventually looked at people he gazed at them with his disturbingly intense eyes, as if he didn't get their references, or maybe they were ants.

His walking was fine after a few days post coma. 

He could feed himself after two months physio therapy and now only a slight tremor in both his hands. 

His head pained him on occasion but he could frown and sort of flutter his hands near the scar and Gabriel would know to get him pain pills and water.

He had nightmares sometimes but most nights he could sleep through.

Gabriel patiently taught him how to look after himself when the rest of the family wanted to put him in a home. 

Gabriel refused point blank, remembering the strong brother who picked him up when he was down, helped him back on his feet to be the man he was now.

Damned if he was going to abandon his brother in his time of need.

So the family put regular payments into his account for Castiels medical bills and any special equipment should he need it and that was fine with Gabriel.

When Gabe finally returned to Uni though he had had to bring Cas with him. 

It had been awful, that first time, telling Cas he had to stay with the Nurse at their home...

Castiel didn't understand. 

He looked confused and then when Gabe had gone to the door, looking to the Nurse and then to Gabe with an ever increasing frown on his face. 

He tilted his head and then when Gabriel reached for the door handle and the Nurse reached for Castiels hand all hell had broken loose.

Castiel had commenced a terrible screaming and began hitting his own head with his fists. Hard hits, with great force, and the Nurse had to really use his muscles to stop Castiel's flailing arms.

Gabe did not go to Uni that day. 

He dismissed the Nurse, paid him for his wasted time, calmed Cas down and gently tended to his new wounds.

He took Cas with him everywhere now. 

Like a taxi driver in the Pimp Mobile, like a Guide Dog when walking. 

Castiel was no trouble. 

He went wherever Gabriel went, even the toilet, and made no fuss as long as Gabe was near.

Sam got to know Castiel slowly. 

Jess also welcomed him into their tiny gang. 

It worked much better than it would have were Cas not damaged and Gabe felt a little guilty when he found himself happy at this. 

He loved Cas. 

He loved Cas a lot.

Sam got Castiel his own pencil set and sketch pad so he could "draw specs" with them. 

Castiel held the pencils in his slightly shaky hands and then looked up at Sam with his eyes filling.

"Oh, Cas, hey, it's okay!" Sam said gently, smiling softly.

"I can art..." Castiel whispered, and Sam laughed and nodded, used to Castiel's way of talking by now.

"You sure can." He said, and Gabriel had a pair of very shiny eyes which he denied later.

Gabriel bought Castiel a leather side satchel and he took to wearing it over his body wherever he went. 

In it was his sketch book and pencils, ready to come out when he had time to sit still next to Gabriel.

His hands were shaky and Gabriel noticed he didn't use any hand consistently. 

Before the bombing he had been right handed.

This was just another sign that Castiel was different, changed, but not less of a human despite it.

His pictures were always extraordinary, detailed, mostly trees and bees.

But always always drawn perfectly upside down.

It was only after he had finished the very very last microdot of detail that he would turn them right side up and put a little "c" in the right hand corner.

Most people accepted Castiel as a part of the University, at worst like furniture, at best as someone to say "hi" to as they walked past.

And if Gabriel one time had to stalk some guys enrolled in on a sports scholarship who had called Castiel a "retard" to his face, corner, punch and kick the living crap out of them quickly and effectively before Cas had noticed him gone....

 

...well, it was his little secret, okay?

#


	7. thats how we laugh the day away in the merry old land of Oz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yay, they all meet!

CHAPTER SEVEN

"thats how we laugh the day away in the merry old land of Oz"

Dean hears the car coming for a mile before it appeared, parking just outside the huge hangar entrance. 

Dean had opened the whole doors to a bit above his head height because his brother was Sasquatch sized and would need to come into his work space without knocking himself senseless.

He stepped outside, squinting in the sun. 

He had not been outside in days.

The car was indeed a thing of beauty. 

Creamy and long and shiny. 

The engine missed a bit though and the chrome was not as shiny as it could be.

Sammy hopped out if the passenger side and enveloped his brother in a close but soft manly hug. 

Sammy was the only one allowed that close.

A shorter--well, everyone was shorter than Sammy--man climbed out of the drivers seat.

"This is Gabriel Novak." Sam said. 

He had given Gabe the rules when interacting with Dean and a was pleased to see Gabe already steadying himself to move at a slower pace. 

He gently extended his hand, lollipop stick hanging from his mouth like a cigarette.

"Pleased to meet you." He said. 

Dean didn't take his hand but gave him a small smile. 

"Hey." Was all he said. 

Sam was super pleased when Gabe merely winked and dropped his hand, not making a bug deal out of Deans snub.

Gabe turned back to the car and opened the back door. 

"Cassy? Want to meet Sam's brother?"

Castiel undid his seat belt and slid out of the car, dragging out his satchel behind him.

"Door....." He said quietly, almost as if he had to, sliding the bag over his trench coat. He stood still then, arms at his side and stared over at Dean.

 

 

 

 

 

"Well fuck" Dean thought. "That is the hottest human I have ever seen. Why did he have to be brain damaged. Now I'll feel like scum if I flirt with him."

So....those thoughts happened. 

He had not had thoughts about men since Benny. 

Not like this. 

He hadn't even taken himself in hand in the shower. 

He figured his dick was as broken as the rest of him.

But this gorgeous man standing here, looking at him with an open but slightly frowny face, eyes like the Pacific Ocean, hair dark and glossy and mussed....

Fuck. 

He was hot.

"Castiel, this is Dean. He doesn't need you to shake his hand. He doesn't like it." Gabriel explained, his hand gently resting on the small of his brothers back.

Castiel stared at Dean and then tilted his head.

"Follow..." He said quietly. He faltered, frowned. Started again. "Follow the yellow brick road."

Dean paused, confused. 

That was a cryptic thing to say, even though Dean knew Castiel thought differently to other people.

"His eyes ARE green." Sam said, and Dean got it. 

He had been told Castiel talked in quotes and it was up to those around him to interoperate. 

You followed the yellow brick road to the Emerald City. 

Deans eyes were green. 

It actually made a lot of sense and was kind of deep.

Dean hoped Castiel was not too smart for him.

Too smart to be his boyfriend you mean Winchester?

He can't be. 

You are too fucked up.

So fucked up your dick is broken and you are lusting after a sick boy!

But he still got a tiny thrill that Cas saw his eyes first, not his face scars. 

Then again, he supposed Castiel had scars too. 

Both of them had scars. 

Inside and out.

"This car is a beauty! Sam said it was, but I thought he was just lying to get you guys out here, do all your fancy University work for you." He said, eyes skating all over the car.

"Bitch." Sam smiled.

"Jerk." Dean automatically replied.

Then he looked to Castiel, instinctively asking:

"May I get a good look at her?"

Castiel stared in that deep way of his and Gabriel's respect for Sam's brother went up a notch.

Most people talked to Castiel through Gabe as if Cas was not there. 

Dean went straight to Castiel as the owner of the car.

"Dean! Bike first, car later!" Sam laughed, just as Castiel was nodding his assent.

"Ehh fine. Come on."

The three of them went inside and Gabriel whistled in appreciation. 

Scattered around were finished bikes, weirdly shaped and only propelled but each one a unique piece of beauty. 

As well as that was the one Dean was currently working on and parts on benches. 

In the corner was Deans desk, cleared to go on any specs that Sam and Gabe may want to discuss. 

The door to Deans flat was closed though. 

He wasn't ready to entertain, although he did have biscuit and coffee making facilities available.

"So, how big do you want this thing?" Dean asked, leading them to he desk.

"I have my laptop in the car, wait a minute." Sam said, running back to the Pimp Mobile

Castiel, meantime, slid off his satchel and put it on the desk.

Then he took off his trench coat and hung it on the back of Deans office chair. 

He rolled up the sleeves of his white shirt, his waistcoat buttons done up incorrectly and his tie askew. 

Dean was staring.

"Yeah, he's a mess." Gabe said fondly. "That hasn't changed."

"Cas...do you need anything before you start work?" Dean asked the dark haired man, earning more brownie points with Gabriel. 

Dean just assumed Castiel was going to help, not sit and sketch.

Castiel shook his head, sat down, and pulled his things from his satchel.

Dean, Sam and Gabe ended up carrying a table over to work on. 

Castiel was way too invested in what he was doing to be disturbed.

After two hours Dean got the gist of what the engineers wanted to do and told them in would take about two months with them helping.

Dean made a parts shopping list because, even though he had a lot there, most were earmarked for future projects.

"Can we see what you are working on now?" Sam asked.

Dean nodded and they made their way over, leaving Cas to continue drawing busily.

"It's basically a cube bike. Got the frame and four wheels but I am tossing up on the way to propel it." Dean explained. 

Gabe lent back on the workbench and admired the frame. 

"It looks solid."

"I'm going for steampunk"

Castiel flowed into view then and handed Dean his drawing.

Dean couldn't believe what he was seeing.

It was his latest bike but finished. It was propelled by the person hanging in a harness, no pedals which is what was confusing Dean before, and steered by leaning, which simplified it again.

"Cas...this is perfect!" He whispered. "This is exactly it! Thank you!"

"Icarus." Castiel said. "Waxy wings"

"Oh yeah, I see it..." Dean said, looking up from the drawing to his half finished bike.

Icarus flew too near the sun and his wings melted.. 

The bike could represent that easily. Dean could actually SEE it!

Then Gabriel accidentally dropped a wrench....

#


	8. Frankie kicked a mine the day that mankind kicked the moon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel is like lip balm. Soothing.

CHAPTER EIGHT

"Frankie kicked a mine the day that mankind kicked the moon"

Dean reacted instantly.

He dropped Castiel's drawing, which fluttered to the ground, turned and ran. 

He didn't scream, he had to save his lungs.

He was aiming for his flat, where he had a panic room in a reinforced wardrobe. 

Behind him he could hear Castiel making sounds of fear, but it was the least of his problems.

He had to run, he had to run away, because something unsafe was....

Steel arms wrapped around him and lifted him off his feet, making him stop running.

He screamed then.

"Dean! Dean, it's okay, it was just a wrench dropping!"

"Let me go Sam, let me go!" Dean yelled, kicking his legs and digging his fingers into Sam's hands.

He knew it was illogical, that the sound was not going to kill him, but his heart was racing and his pulse was pounding in his neck and if that didn't mean danger was coming then what did?

"Dean please, it's all okay, you're okay!"

"Sammy let me go! Let me go!! Please!!" Dean begged, hating the sob in his voice.

"Dean, stop struggling! You'll hurt yourself!"

"Sammy please! Who's screaming!? Who the fuck is screaming!!??" Deans voice was hysterical now.

His legs kicked harder but Sammy swung him round and they both ended up crashing to the ground on their arses. 

Dean could see Gabriel grappling with Castiel's wrists as the man tried to smack his own head. 

"Cassy, it's okay, Dean got a fright, it's okay pal, I promise!"

"Dean...you're scaring Cas..." Sammy said, right into Deans ear. 

Dean stopped arching himself up into Sam's Sasquatch body then, but his teeth stayed bared and his eyes were still wild. 

He was thrumming with fear but for some reason the sight of Castiel freaking out about his own panic attack calmed him quicker than even hiding in the Panic Room did.

"See Dean? He's scared because you are scared. He doesn't know what happened to you, why you are so frightened. He only knows his new friend is terrified and he is having a hard time processing that." Sam explained, hugging Deans arms crossed close over Deans heaving torso, holding Deans wrists tightly, squeezing him to help him feel grounded.

Deans breathing actually started to settle, his heart rate coming down. He was still scared witless but he didn't want...

"Castiel!" Gabe said. "Look...LOOK! Sam is hugging him now. He's okay. It's okay. See? Look at him..." 

Castiel allowed Gabriel to continue to hold his wrists, but he turned those icy blue eyes to Dean, Dean felt soothed. 

He felt calmer. 

His breathing deliberately slowed down and suddenly he slumped, lax, in Sam's arms.

The crisis was over. 

Castiel snapped loose from Gabriel's hands and stalked over to Dean. He crouched down, staring into Deans eyes.

Then he reached out his tremoring hands and cupped Deans face.

Sam was surprised that Dean allowed it.

"Calm?" He asked, voice deep and rough.

"Yes. Yes Cas. I'm calm now. I'm good."

Castiel held Deans face a second longer and then stood.

"Juice." He said, and went to the coffee urn. 

There was no juice so Castiel poured water from the jug into a glass and carried to to Dean with his shaking hand. Gabriel attempted to help him but Cas pulled away. He crouched to Dean again, holding the glass with both hands to steady it.

He held it to Deans mouth.

"D is for delicious." He said, seriously. 

Dean sipped and surprisingly it helped. It wasn't the water though, it was the kindness and the act if doing something normal like drinking.

"Thank you Castiel." He said quietly.

"Thanks Cas," Sam added.

Castiel nodded seriously then went to retrieve his fallen picture. He handed it back to Den.

"Make this." He said and it seemed like therapeutic advice not a command. 

Dean nodded. 

He said nothing.

#


End file.
